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A Blacksburg-based professional coach aims to help families support their elders.
Robin Weeks’s mother was in her 80s when both her husband of 65 years and her eldest son died in one tragic week.
“I don’t think she ever recovered,” says Weeks, a leadership trainer who lives in Giles County. “For her, that grief never left.”
Though Jane Sutherland Weeks lived in a comfortable retirement community in Maryville, Tenn., she needed more support than Robin Weeks could provide from four hours away. So Weeks moved her mother to a Blacksburg assisted-living apartment — and became a caregiver.
Over the next six-and-a-half years, mother and daughter made beautiful memories — visits to Weeks’s farm, trips to The Greenbrier resort, music performances at the retirement community. It was the happiest season of their relationship, Weeks says.
But as her mother’s health declined, Weeks’s responsibilities rose. During her mother’s final three years, Weeks cut her client list — and her income — by 30 percent, she says. “I was spending between 20 and 30 hours a week on visits and care.”
Weeks is far from alone. A National Alliance for Caregiving and AARP report reveals that nearly 42 million Americans were caring for someone over the age of 50 in 2019, an increase of eight million since 2014. The study showed that 15% of working caregivers reduced their hours; another 11% quit their job or retired early to provide care.
“Most caregivers in the workplace are struggling with that constant balancing act of trying to manage work and manage care,” she says. “And people don’t talk about it. It’s not like having a baby.
“There are days when I would pull up in the parking lot of [my mother’s] building,” Weeks remembers. “I would sit in the car for 30 minutes and do some deep breathing. I never wanted her to know how stressful it was.”
Yet, when her mother died at nearly 94, Weeks felt depressed. Adrift.
“I had lost not only my mother that I saw every single day. I lost a role as a caregiver that had come to mean a lot to me.”
She wondered if she could tap into her expertise as coach and trainer to support and prepare other caregivers.
So in 2020, Weeks became a Certified Caregiving Consultant. Since then, she’s offered one-on-one coaching for caregivers, compiled resources for individuals and employers, and presented and written on the burdens of care.
She has plans to create a membership website where those who subscribe would have access not only to Weeks and her resources but also to a community of caregivers who could collectively answer questions. Weeks wants to make her site available to human resource departments, many of whom are not aware of the demands on their employees as they care for loved ones, Weeks says.
“I want to reach these caregivers in the workplace. Most employers don’t even know how many there are. There is no support for them.”
If caregivers could discover available resources, get help navigating the healthcare system, find answers to end-of-life questions, Weeks says, caring for a loved one wouldn’t have to be as isolating and difficult.
“There is something about caring for your parent at the end of their life that is a powerful experience,” she says. “I don’t think I’ve ever felt compassion that deeply for another human being.”
Find more information about Robin Weeks’s caregiving services at mypivotalpoint.com/caregiving-consulting.
The story above is a preview from our July/August 2021 issue. For more stories, subscribe today or view our FREE digital edition. Thank you for supporting local journalism!
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